How to Never Let Outside Circumstances Dictate How You Feel

The power over how you respond to what you experience is in your hands. Or, more precisely, it's in your mind. This is the inner mindset work I call BECOMING™, and you can start using it today.

A hard season you didn't choose is like a personal growth retreat none of us asked for. It's happening anyway, and if your confidence has faltered, you're in good company. That hurts my heart, because I know it does not have to be this way.

From anxious to entrepreneurial

When my client Danielle and I started working together, she was going through a divorce, the mental mindf*** of a lifetime for so many women. She'd been in and out of therapy for decades, and her daily anxiety ran her life. As she practiced BECOMING and realized her inner power, everything changed.

Later, when Danielle was laid off in a company restructure, old-her would have felt like a victim and questioned her self-worth. Instead, she chose her response, and today she has started three epically successful businesses in New York City.

The scorching hot truth of your power

No external circumstance is holding you back. Your partner, your mother-in-law, your to-do list, and your noisy industry are not the reason you're stuck wishing and hoping.

The only thing holding you back is you. You are your problem… and you are your solution.

When you know this on a deep level and LIVE it daily, everything around you becomes a playground for your delight and your success. Life is the ultimate choose-your-own-adventure, and since none of us are getting out alive, why not choose the most epic one?

Try it right now

Pause and notice. Put your hand on your heart and take a deep breath. Let yourself really notice how many choices you have in this moment, doing this exercise being one of them.

Find the space. Say your boss tells you the company is making cuts and your job is gone. Most people hear that news and dive straight into hurt and fear. But there is a space after the circumstance and before the feeling, where a thought or belief appears.

Make a choice. That space is where your inner power lives, because it's where you choose what to think. What if you chose to have faith that everything is happening for your highest good? Notice what feelings arise from that belief.

Can you feel the difference? It's night and day.

That is why mindset work is not a would-be-nice luxury. It is the command center of every experience you have, from spilling your coffee to weathering the hardest season of your life. Most people are completely derailed by the spilled coffee, especially when they're already running late for an important meeting.

Our world is waiting for you

Every one of us will face circumstances outside our control. Divorce, layoffs, loss, you name it. And on the other side of a season like that, you will either have spent the time treading water, or you'll be swimming miles ahead.

It's easy to stand in your power when you're generating multiple six figures and managing a team of A-players. Not so much when life sideswipes you, right? That's why this work matters more when life is hard, not less. Every one of those circumstances is a beautiful, calligraphed invitation, and this is where the fun begins.

I'm not the first person to tell you that mindset is everything. But have you noticed people say that without ever telling you how? That is exactly what you learn inside BECOMING, where you become the observer of yourself and use your mind for its actual intended purpose: to make magic.

The next time something outside your control triggers you, put your hand on your heart, take a breath, and ask yourself: What am I choosing to make this mean, and what would I choose to believe instead?

Related articles by Tracy Litt:

Why Successful Women Hit an Invisible Ceiling, and Where Strategy Runs Out

7 Habits of Empire-Building Women

Why Your Brain Resists Change (and How to Move Through It)